Be More Reasonable In Arguments
7/5 update: Based on the “argument” I had with Mulan the other day about depression 202007031900 where I was indirectly trying to prove to Mulan that her point that she is mildly depressed is false, I clearly haven’t done much to progress towards this argument. This is why the weekly review is essential - so I can more regularly think about these things and get the change to reflect more frequently.
This doesn’t 100% apply, because this is about how to argue/reason with dumb/ignorant people, but:
- Never argue. Don’t try to convince them with reason, logic, or facts. It just doesn’t work, wears everybody out, and can put a strain on your relationship.
- Don’t appear smug, lecturing, or from a high horse. This makes them understandably more defensive and weakens your point.
- Be patient, understanding, and a good listener. Getting them out of this is a process. If you rush, you will over-push and eventually be seen as a threat.
- Try to find common ground and things on which you can agree with them. This will ease tensions and give you more credibility.
- If you get attacked, simply ignore it. You can also share your feelings and let them know how this hurts you.
- Don’t make every encounter about those topics in question. Having less controversial conversations about different things will help to slowly get back to a fruitful communication.
Created from: Goals For 2020 202006132045
uid: 202006132049 tags: #insights #howto